To be honest, not every individual cares on a daily basis if they have friends in the workplace or have the ability to make friends, and influence people. However, to become more efficient in their career or to get promoted to a high level, how to make friends and influence people is important.
I believe that to enjoy your life, and your career to the fullest, one must care about how they are perceived by others. It is time to start when young, just out of college to care about how you influence others. Being an influence, especially a good influence to others, means you are doing something very right. When you are an influence to others, it is notices by those who are around you.
Here are some things to ponder:
No one is perfect, but certain flaws within our personality will keep us from making friends, landing the job, getting that promotion, or gaining the new client. We will never be perfect, but we can be believable, and that is how we build friendships and become an influence to others.
- It is part of a character that is less smooth, less perfect, and maybe a little rough.
- Compared to a piece of material: It can be a torn place, a hole, a pulled thread, or seems that are not lined up together, hemming which has come unraveled, a spot of something and the list goes on.
Examples of flaws:
- It may be the tone of our voice
- The facial expressions when we speak
- The fact that we become defensive is asked a question not known
- Not being prepared to give our information as we should
- Someone who speaks loudly or above others at any cost
- Having an attitude of “I know more than you; and I am the speaker”
So, now it is time that we start to focus on our ability to influence others and become an inspiration, so that others will listen. Successful women, know that influence is one of the essential characteristics of how to build better relationships in business and leading others.
How to make friends and influence people, you speak and others listen:
- You speak with confidence, and you know the facts when giving good advice or instructions. You do not stumble around with many “and ugh s,” and that is why they listen.
- You are prepared and well-read with the knowledge that is being transmitted to your audience.
- You speak about changes that are possible that may need to improve, a certain task or project without degrading another.
- You know how to take charge of an unexpected defeat, mend what is broken and encourage the team to re-group.
- Your responses are smooth toned, with even consistency, regardless of who you are speaking to.
- A person with great influence never exploits hostility, they are in charge of their emotions.
- Successful individuals who have high influence with others can give credit to someone else who gives a solution.
- An influential person can handle a project gone wrong (regardless of who’s fault) without wringing their hands and going berserk. Instead they take the opportunity to emphasis their strengths by immediately coming up with solutions and applying knowledge to change the end results.
How does one become wise enough to stand not with the crowd, but often alone, make their voice strong and powerful and build this kind of influence?
- Make sure you know what you are talking about before you speak, and then there will be less reason to react poorly when you have criticism.
- A person who is emotionally intelligent can take criticism and works it to their gain and not be upset.
- One important issue is being able to recognize other people’s insecurities and/or emotional needs also.
- Speak with authority, but not as a dictator
- Anyone who is comfortable with themselves, are usually smart enough to know when they need to shut up.
- Arrogance will not build a good relationship with anyone, or the ability to influence
- Those who are inclined to have emotional intelligence are people who recognize they do not have to prove anything to anyone. They simply have to know their stuff, inside and out. They must know how to get people involved and they are sensitive to other people’s feelings.
To easily make friends and influence others, one must have the characteristics of a person who gets alone with everyone. Being someone who can befriend everyone at work does not mean that you visit them at home. It simply means that you have the know how to get along with everyone, and that work should be pleasant and fun. This kind of person treats everyone with respect and a fresh hello every day. They control their mood swings and they appreciate what each person has to contribute. They do not gang up and hold gossip sessions about members of the crew. They are far too emotionally intelligent to even consider gossip. They know it is a waste of time and energy, and that while they might be talking about another; someone may be talking about them.
Winning influence or respect with others is an art. It takes a person who is well grounded in promoting growth within themselves and others. Jealousy is not a part of their personality. These people who are most “influential” decided a long time ago that to be a success this kind of inappropriate behaviors was out of line.
Women, or any individual who has been on their journey to becoming influential, began by setting their goals and by knowing that knowledge helps to gain respect, but how you treat others is the just as important. Knowledge rules with a good attitude and knowing how to disperse it to other.
People, who are an influence are masters at knowing how and when to say something. I might also add, and when not to say anything at all. In fact they love to share and help others with what they have learned, but they are not dead set on making their understanding, the only understanding.
Is anyone listening to you?
P. S. Start your progress today for being more influence, and see how powerful this will make your business grow, your friendships grow, or make your leadership role easier.