Not every day is a good writing day; however, the thought of resilience in a woman’s life came to me, and we know that it is essential to survive life. Today we need to talk about it. It does not matter what else might be missing in our emotional run to make life good; we need resilience. We need strength from a higher power who will keep up from getting down and not getting up again.
Where do we begin? My thoughts go to the important fact that some say; life is as good as we make it. That is true to some extent and how we pick up the pieces when life hits us hard, is what we call resilience. We have obstacles that are out of our control. Accidents that can take part of our life, as we once knew it away. There is no way to live life without some hard knocks along the way.
The reason for this is that we only have control over ourselves and not another, and certainly not our entire existence. Life brings tragedy, disappointments, and discouragements that we have no way of turning around before they occur. We cannot rule the universe. Very often, the universe sends pain and suffering.
In this Faith Matter Post here is a scripture of significance:
“There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.” 1Corinthians 10:13 KJV
People can say all they want they have no worries, or life-things to conquer. If they are voicing their life is perfect (which includes work, family members, friends, etc.); they are lying to themselves and disaster may be about to change their mind. They will experience a time of worry and even pain. We all do, and yes, some of it is our own doing, but not all tragedy is our fault.
The above is not being negative, or trying to sell anyone, anything. It is just a point to be aware of on a daily basis. Not fear, but aware of. Unpleasant facts; no one is exempt from the less than desirable roadblocks in life. They come, some are worse than others are, some take a toll on our spirit, our mind, and our joy. Some leave us with disabilities that must be in some form, dealt with. How do we overcome, regain our composure, and live life normal again?
My version: It is the power within to be hit, knocked down, or frozen by life, and come back with more courage, inspiration, tranquility, and strength than before. The power of the Spirit that is within us when we have “faith in God.”
Dictionary: springing back, rebounding, and returning to original form or position after being bent, compressed, or stretched.
Psychologists- have identified some of the facts that make someone resilient: a positive attitude, optimism, the ability to control emotions, and the ability to take failure as a lesson learned. Yet they also say that a positive attitude does not necessarily cure all. Re: Psychology Today
One of my friends told me once, “Linda, you always land on your feet.” I will never forget that statement and it was through our years of friendship working together that she saw my ability to turn something bad to something not so bad. No, I am not bragging, and yes, I have had times within my life that I did not bounce as quickly as I would have liked. No, I have not had a tragedy such as losing a limb, or cancer, or a debilitating disease. Not yet, and I am thankful. So far, I have determined not to let what hits me, kill me, or believe I could not rise above whatever it was. However, I have not experienced the greatest losses either.
Here is where the strength and resilience can make some of us, very little people. When those who have lost a member of their body, have cancer, become paralyzed, or cannot see, rise to more stardom than ever. They take what is left, and make it an exception and solution for what is missing. These are the heroes of resilience. These are the people to watch to pattern our sustainability, and resilience. Those who have looked within themselves found a profound ability to rise from the deepest, darkest moment in their life.
- Do not look back, just press forward; you cannot change the past, it is done, over with and it is time to forget.
- Do not focus on what you should or could have done differently.
- Do not allow self-talk to demonize your plans for the future.
- Do not try to figure out what you did that was so wrong, focus on what you did right, and work from there. Often one does nothing wrong, however do not let pity destroy possibilities. Press forward.
- See to understand, however do not question that which has no answers.
Things To Remember
- We are all human, humans fail, they are jilted, they foil, they are not always emotionally intelligent, they often forget to be kind, and more often forget that what you give out is what you will get back. I know this is karma, but it is very true.
- Be grateful for your dilemma as there are those individuals who have suffered more loss than you might ever. They have overcome by their profound ability to believe in the inevitable perseverance of ‘can do’ attitude.
- See yourself as someone who has to learn, grow, understand, become more aware of your own actions, learning to discipline yourself, and think before you leap.
- Learning to be more aware of your decision-making, weigh the odds, and consider the outcome.
- Remember to listen to “all” the words spoken by others, not just what you want to hear. For instance, “do you want to come with me to the party?” Instead of: “I want you to come with me to the party, please.”
- Take your life seriously; cherish it early in your life. If you live your life on the edge, you are bound to have more adjustments to make and it will depend upon the strength of your resilience to bounce back.
Closing -true story: In my twenties, I experienced a very bad season of allergies, sinus infection, and cold. I actually lived in Denver where one’s sinus problems should have been better. At one point I was hospitalized, and had breathing problems. I was pregnant with my only son at the time. Sometime after my son was born, I began having noise in my right ear. We moved back south, and my doctor had me tested by specialist and the exact cause was never established. My hearing grew worse with time.
I continued to have tinnitus and I continued to lose my hearing with age progression. I began wearing hearing aids, and they decided to put the aid in my good ear to give me more clarity. The right ear did not give sufficient capabilities of hearing best. I could hear some; however, I did not understand certain tones, leaving me unable to understand words spoken by many individuals.
For some reason, I decided I would not let this derail my life. I continued with my career. I did not mention my disability I just pursued with what ability I had left. Through the years, I lost more hearing in my good, the left ear. I bought phone voice controls for the phone systems at work. Sometimes they worked, other times they did not. I could never get comfortable with the aid in the worst ear, and the left became worse as the years passed. However, I managed a full career of 31 years approximately.
No, it was not all peaches and ice cream. There was difficulty, criticism on the last, and times of wishing I were somewhere else. However, I never thought about quitting, or not trying to work as long as I possibly could. IN ADDITION, I did! After all the laws of discrimination was on my side.
Unbelievably, this is not my whole story either, just like everyone else; I have had my share of reaching for more resilience, however I find my faith in God to be the stronghold of my life.
Keep your chin up, keep living joyfully and know that you are not alone.